Mentality Monday: Joshua & Niki On Cognitive Dissonance
- Joshua U.
- 3 days ago
- 4 min read
cognitive dissonance (n) :
psychological conflict resulting from incongruous (non-harmonious) beliefs and attitudes held simultaneously
Illustration of cognitive dissonance | MINDPEERS
Happy Holidays! You still feel good about those products you picked up for yourself on Black Friday, even though you knew good & damn well that they were out of your budget -- and now you're going to have to figure out a way to make that money stretch ahead of Christmas?
I don't mean to start off so aggressively here. But, hey: some mental health matters need to addressed sternly, not so softly.
Cognitive dissonance is one of them for me. The mental strain one can put themselves through when their actions consistently go AGAINST what their beliefs and values are over a long period of time can be incredibly destructive.
The theory of cognitive dissonance was coined by American social psychologist Leon Festinger. At the risk of sounding like a dork; Festinger is an absolute legend in the psychology game. His bevy of work on the relationship between psychological state and social behavior is foundational in terms of how we view and discuss mental health today. Festinger wrote his full dissertation on cognitive dissonance in 1957.
Leon Festinger is viewed as a pioneer in the psychology field, mainly for being the originator of the theory of cognitive dissonance through his 1957 book, A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance.
Perhaps the most important of Festinger's findings is this: as humans, we're automatically wired to seek internal harmony -- equilibrium, if you will.
One of the first things I learned upon starting therapy almost a decade ago is that our one of our brains' central functions is to keep us feeling safe. That fact was reinforced by Festinger's work:
“The existence of dissonance, being psychologically uncomfortable, will motivate the person to try to reduce the dissonance and achieve consonance (harmony). When dissonance is present, in addition to trying to reduce it, the person will actively avoid situations and information which would likely increase the dissonance.” - Leon Festinger, A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance
Upon the realization of our actions not lining up with our beliefs, or when newly presented information (facts) contradicts with our already-held beliefs, we usually have two choices to make. We can either:
Confront the conflict and go on to actively correct our behavior.
Come up with justifications and rationalizations in order to continue our flawed behavior. (I like to call this "mental gymnastics.”)
Both choices fall right in line with the way our brains naturally operate. Whether it's through conjuring the willpower to change or coming up with excuses to continue our behavior amidst conflict, it's all fixed towards our brains' goal of reaching that equilibrium; that harmony.
There's so many examples of cognitive dissonance that can be pointed to, and we can place ourselves into this internal battle for a number of reasons. To speak personally for a moment, I've placed myself in situations that I knew damn well I had no business being in, but due to societal norms, peer pressure or mob mentality, short-term benefits, etc... I remained in those spots at the long-term detriment of my own mental health.
Of course, phrases like "actions speak louder than words" didn't just appear out of thin air; that phrase in particular refers directly to the phenomenon of cognitive dissonance. In less-than-healthy, dare I say "toxic" relationships, this inner tug-of-war typically runs rampant.
Consider the example of the unfaithful partner alongside the "cry-and-stay" partner. For the unfaithful cheater, they're aware how their behavior affects their partner and how it's destroying the relationship as a whole. The thrill, excitement and attention they receive when they do step out on the relationship become too rewarding to pass up -- thus, the behavior continues.
I've always wanted to use a generic "unhappy relationship" stock photo in one of my pieces. This is a big moment for your boy!
For the "cry-and-stay" partner, the pain has become suffocating. Being in the relationship has become completely & utterly draining. But they'll tell themselves something along the lines of "it could be worse" to keep themselves in the cycle of suffering.
Wherever it is that cognitive dissonance rears its head in your life, it's extremely easy for us to feel like we're weak amidst our struggle. That feeling of weakness can then bring about those all-too-familiar feelings of guilt and shame. The truth is that it's not really weakness -- it's more-so scientific. It's human.
That point was one of many that NikiMarie and I focused on driving home on this latest episode of Mentality Monday. For those that are familiar with the project already, you know all about our formula in recording episodes by now: mixing research and documented psychological work with both personal AND societal examples; we continued with that and then some on this episode discussing cognitive dissonance.
Double-tap the photo for more information about The Recess Bell's mental health project, mental-ity!
Did you know there are four types of cognitive dissonance? Did you know that there are five signs that our minds & bodies will showcase signaling that cognitive dissonance is present in us? What about our OWN experiences with cognitive dissonance across the board -- including in the areas of finances, physical fitness, diet, and love?
Yes, Niki and I dug deep into the phenomenon of cognitive dissonance in all aspects. Listen to our discussion on the topic below! If you like the episode, make sure to follow The Recess Bell Podcast wherever you get your podcasts from.